I’ve decided not to look on the past year with regrets. It’s far too easy to do that and it keeps one from moving forward. At least, that’s my thinking about it. The past year brought many changes to my life, many big changes. My health forced my hand in taking retirement from teaching. I still have the passion, but not the stamina. Then a beloved family member passed. But the closing of doors opened new windows.
Right now I sit in a new home. For the past several months I cleaned up my previous residence, listed it, and sold it. While that was underway, I emptied and rehabbed my uncle’s condo with new flooring and paint. It is now my home. Though it looks nothing like it did when he lived here, I feel his kind presence often.
But downsizing has its rewards and challenges. Yes, I don’t have as much area to keep clean and am not responsible for the outdoor maintenance; however, there’s not as much space and the management company does a less than passable job of outdoor maintenance. Plus I have no basement. So, there has been a great purge of my “stuff.” To that end, many charities have benefitted which makes me feel very good. It also means I must deal with my penchant for hanging on to things.
Why do we do it? I suppose it’s the retention of memories and thoughts of “the good old days.” I know I can’t go back and, frankly, I don’t want to. I always thought it would be cool to have an experience like the one Dan Fogelberg sings about in “Same Old Lang Syne.” “Met my old lover in the grocery store/The snow was falling, Christmas Eve..” The song is about Dan running into an old high school girlfriend. Honestly, I think we dream about these things and the reality is far different. I wouldn’t want to go back to that former time. In the present I’m such a different individual, I scoff at what I was then.
Oh well. I have no set resolutions but a promise to myself to improve my health. Yes, I suppose it’s similar to what most people resolve for a new year but I plan to view it as a long term investment and not a quick fix. In my mind it becomes less of a resolution and more of a lifestyle change. Best wishes to all for a happy and healthy New Year.
My writing endeavors are still on hold while I continue to unpack and get settled. My office is shaping up but is not a priority at this point with so many other things yet to do. But I’m excited when I think about what I will be doing and will certainly share it here once I get started.